The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner
by nitrolead
Summary: Kira didn’t want to wait. With Aizen's fall and his remaining minions being hunted down every week, it was a perfect time to begin building a family. He had someone in mind and was ready to propose. Unfortunately, Murphy's Law got involved. KiraMatsu.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Greetings! I've been meaning to submit this story for the longest time, but I didn't know how to go about starting it. Izuru Kira is one of my favorite Bleach characters and I decided I might as well take a shot at writing a fic about him, since there aren't too many invloving him as a principal character, much less a het fic. So I figured that if I was going to do this, I might as well make it crack. That's where Matsumoto comes in... the pun was intended. Enjoy!

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**Chapter 01-- The Question**

Kira stared into the mirror. Shifting his eyes slightly, he noticed a glistening on his brow and reached to wipe it, surprised to find that his hand was moist when he pulled it away. As he had suspected, the men's room was indeed humid.

Under other circumstances, the blond would have been careful about breathing in too much of the air circulating in a public bathroom, but given that this was a decent restaurant and that the other customers appeared to be of good hygiene, he took a long-needed deep breath.

Kira watched his cheeks slowly deflate from the air being released from inside.

"Hey, are you okay?" Asked a calm, anonymous voice from a stall not too far from where Kira was standing, "You looked to be hyperventilating a little when I came in. Do you need an ambulance or something?"

Kira smiled. "No, thank you. I'm fine, truly."

"If you say so," the man responded, appearing to lose interest, "Grip that sink any harder, kid, and you'll be washing dishes for this place in no time."

Kira stared down and was surprised to see that he was indeed gripping the sink a tad bit too much. He pinched his nose and gave off a nervous sigh.

"It looks like I'm still constipated."

Kira blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Constipated. Still."

The bathroom was quickly filled with a silence that was only interrupted by another man coming in to use of the three urinals to Kira's right.

"What seems to be your problem kid?" The silence was broken after the second man flushed and zipped his pants, "We've all got our problems… surely yours isn't as bad as mine, ne?"

Kira closed his eyes and shook his head, resisting the urge to laugh. To think, that he was talking to a nameless middle-aged man sitting on a toilet waiting for a bowel movement.

"I'm going to propose to my girlfriend tonight." Kira finally revealed the source of his anxiety, "I'm nervous."

"Huh," the man voiced, "How long have you two been dating?"

"Almost ten years now."

There was a clunk heard from the stall, leading Kira to believe that the man might've hit his head.

"Just how old are you?"

The blond then remembered that he was in the world of the living. Kira looked to be young enough to be the man's son, thereby implying that he had started dating as a tween.

"Well!" The blond quickly added, making up a lie on the spot, "We've known each other since we were in school," _over fifty years ago_ , "but our third anniversary is coming up."

"High school sweethearts, eh?"

"Yeah…"

"Meh." The man said, clearly indifferent judging by his voice, "Not too many couples around marrying young… I wish you the best of luck, kid."

* * *

"You seem nervous, Izuru. Are you okay? You've been fidgeting since we left the restaurant."

"No, I'm fine." He lied, feeling the hair near his temples dampen with perspiration.

"Okay, if you say so," Momo replied suspiciously before returning her attentions to her vanilla ice cream cone.

He thought it wise that he hadn't told Renji about his plans as the red head would have probably pushed him ahead in the four times Kira had bailed on following through making the proposal. He wanted to do this at his own pacing and today, today would be the day he would ask.

In fact, Kira had made a personal wager: if this turned out to be the fifth failed attempt, then he would give Renji his monthly paycheck. Although he had enough money saved to sustain himself for longer than that, the thought that the paycheck would likely be used to buy another pair of ridiculously expensive shades provided enough incentive.

Kira squared his shoulders and cleared his throat.

_Here we go…_

"Momo, can I ask you something?"

"Hmmm?" She responded, taking a lick from her cone.

"Will you marry me?"

Momo paused and slowly turned to face him with a dumbfounded expression.

"Oh! Here, I almost forgot." Kira nervously searched his pocket for the small box and firmly placed it in her palm when he found it.

It was no secret that Kira had harbored a crush on Momo since their days in the Academy. He thought it strange that during those years when his companions were using their time in school to mature into young adults and able Shinigami, he had begun thinking about things most students his age wouldn't even think about for decades, perhaps even centuries.

Lying awake in his bunk at night due to Renji's snores in the bunk above him, he would wonder what kind of woman he would marry and how many children they would have. What kind of life they would lead and whether he would grow old with his wife.

His own mother and father had not married until an age when it was reasonable to expect that the couple would never have children and they didn't expect to either. Had they still been alive, Kira would have appeared to be their grandson rather than their first and only son.

He didn't want to wait. With Aizen defeated and his remaining minions being hunted down one by one every week, it was a perfect time to begin building a family. With his position as Lieutenant of the Third Division and acting head of it, it was reasonable to expect that his line of duty would put him in dangerous situations. If he had survived the Winter War, then he could make through anything.

"I--" Momo spoke, and his heart leapt, "I can't accept this."

Everything stopped.

Kira had asked a question that had two potential answers, yet he had not expected for a second that the reply would be in the negative. As far as he knew, the last ten years had been an enjoyable experience to them both… what had he done wrong? Then again, why had he been so nervous back in the bath room? Had he subconsciously been aware of the possibility?

"Why?" Kira asked, looking away to hide his dismay.

Momo bit her lip. "You deserve better."

Kira quickly looked at her in bewilderment.

_This sudden revelation made after ten years..._

_She's hiding something…_

"You're not telling me everything, Momo." Kira said in a curt voice that surprised both of them.

She looked down in shame, "I was going to call it quits before this… I just didn't know how."

Anger bubbled up within him. Momo had been planning their break up for how long? To think, that while he had been shaking like a fool, going over where and when he would propose, she was planning something else entirely.

"Why now?" He demanded in a hollow voice, "Why not last year? Three years? Four years? Why now? What did I do?"

Momo slid her hand in his and squeezed it. She refused to look at him, even though he wanted to make eye contact. Instead, she focused her gaze in their joined hands.

"Four months ago, during Rangiku's party. You left early because you had to present a report the next morning at a captain's meeting detailing how the Third Division was fairing without a captain. We drank a lot. I did stupid things, we all did that night."

Momo pulled his hand from his and placed both her hand on her knees to squeeze.

"I slept with Shyuuhei. It was an accident!" She looked at Kira, but his face did not revealing anything.

"I-is that why he has been avoiding me?"

Momo nodded.

"It was an accident Momo, like you said. I know you'd never do anything like that intentionally." Kira grasped her hand, "We all make mistakes."

He wouldn't forget this incident right away, but with time, he'd cope. He had too. His knew his relationship with Momo was strong enough to overcome something of this magnitude.

"You're a good guy, Izuru," Momo gave him a quick kiss and choked back a sob, "but the answer is still 'no'."

With that, Momo shunpoed away, leaving Kira alone with no companion but his thoughts and an unopened velvet box.

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A/N: Lemme know what you guys think. R&R Ladies and Gents!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: It's been forever since the last update, no? Well, I apologize for that. Most of my time was taken up finishing a costume and studying for a midterms.

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**Chapter 02- The Maruyama Hotel**

Kira sat listening to the old record player playing an unknown woman's gloomy song. Given that he was in a bar in the middle of Rukongai, he didn't understand how the owner of the establishment had come to own this particular record or why he played it even though there weren't many people in the area who could understand the lyrics.

Before transferring to the Third division, Kira had gone on a three year long mission in the world of the living. There, he had wandered the streets in the city known world wide as the city of love. It didn't take him long to learn the language and he had made a promise to himself that he would bring Momo to give her a tour, as a friend or as he had hoped then, as something more.

That was decades ago.

Now, now he was drunk. He couldn't even remember why he was so drunk in the first place. But one thing he knew for sure: if he could still hear himself think, then he obviously hadn't drank enough. He called the barmaid and ordered her to leave the bottle. Ami, or whatever her name was, did as she was asked.

Kira had worked out a system with the bar: before he lost cognition due to the alcohol in his blood, he'd pay a generous amount to cover whatever it is that he would order in the future in his drunken stupor. If it resulted that he'd leave the bar not having met the limit, then Ami would either return the balance on his next visit or he'd use it as credit.

About an hour later, he had finished up the bottle and thrown up on the floor, which got him tossed out of the bar and tasting dirt as he slid across a dirt road.

It was almost dark and his wallet still had a decent amount of cash left in it. Kira walked, or rather trudged, east towards his favorite bar.

* * *

Matsumoto was feeling the buzz. Her eyes would shift in one direction and her sight would lag behind, so that when her mind settled on a slumped figure sitting alone at the bar, it had to wait a second or two for her sight to register who the person was.

She wasn't the least bit surprised that it was Kira. Many Shinigami frequented this particular bar. No, what did surprise her was that the blonde was out of his mind beyond belief shitfaced. The way he even struggled to find the shot glass under his nose peaked her interest in how he had come to be that way. The last time Matsumoto had seen him in that state had been years ago after learning of his Captain's defection.

Plus, his uniform was caked with mud, indicating that this wasn't the bar he had started out in.

Matsumoto's reason for being there was to let off some steam after her return from an intense weeklong mission in the world of the living. She had wanted a little down time for herself, but some of the Eleventh Division Shinigami that had been members of her party urged her to come with them for a drink. All they had to say was "Drinks are on me" and she was game.

So, Matsumoto moved over to Kira's location to ask if he was alright.

She tapped his shoulder and received a grunt in response.

"Kira. What's… the matter?" Perhaps she was more than buzzed. Her speech was slowing and before long, she'd be slurring.

Kira gave another grunt, but this one sounded a little on the whine-ish side, as if she were disrupting his drunken brooding time.

Matsumoto tapped him again, perhaps a little more hard. "Why are you…here?"

"Feck off!" Kira garbled as he slapped off Matsumoto's hand and tried to shove her away.

The momentum did not transfer well. Kira dived past Matsumoto and banged his head against one of the barstools on his way down to the floor. It was probably a good thing that his head hit the barstool, otherwise, his head would have split open. Instead, he ended up with a small shard of glass lodged in his chin that was bleeding enough to give the appearance of ketchup.

Matsumoto felt someone brush past her abruptly to pick up Kira by the collar.

"Hey! What's your problem?!" The man, a new recruit, yelled as he pulled his fist back and dealt Kira a blow between the cheekbone and nose. The recruit had obviously done it in an effort to impress her and his colleagues, but she shook her head in disapproval. His friends were more vocal.

"Kawasaki! Are you crazy? That's Lieutenant Kira, you idiot!"

The man's eyes bulged at the floored drunkard who lay comically still. Kawasaki pulled the hand latching onto Kira's collar away and immediately bowed.

"I'm deeply sorry Lieutenant! Please don't report me to Captain Zaraki!"

"He can't understand you, idiot. The man's clearly piss drunk."

Matsumoto shrugged. She wasn't his caretaker. He'd have to fend for himself like any other Shinigami who chose to get drunk by himself. Walking away from the group, she briefly wondered if Kira's current state had anything to do with Momo.

"Whatever guys," Matsumoto called the men over, "More sake for us, no?"

* * *

Yoshito Maruyama was bored out of his mind. He checked the wall clock and groaned to find that it was only 3:15 in the morning. His shift ended in five hours. Yoshito huffed.

He was 176 years old for crying out loud! If he wanted to go to a gentlemen's club without telling his father, then it was perfectly acceptable! His friends didn't catch any flak with their parents! Then again, none of his friends had Madoka Maruyama for a mother.

As punishment, Yoshito's mother had sentenced him to three months at the family hotel where she could keep an eye on him. To make matters worse, he was stuck working the graveyard shift for all of those nine weeks as the clerk.

His father had won the large house in a high-stakes card game fifty years ago, so it had been converted as a hotel to service people on their way west towards the fish markets of the west coast. His older sister worked as the cook and his older brother as the janitor. It appeared he was being groomed for a position in the family business.

It was boring work.

So when Yoshito heard the door bell tinkle signaling the arrival of a potential customer, he didn't bother looking up from his magazine. Instead, he licked his index finger to flip the next page. He'd heard his older sister complain about the drunks that came in for a few seconds and then left after realizing that this wasn't wherever it is that they were heading for.

A hand came down on his magazine.

"Eysh. Eysh. Serbiss."

_Hey. Hey Service. _

Yoshito sighed and pulled the magazine from under the feminine hand.

"Yeah? Whadd'ya want?"

Yoshito's eyebrows raised at the sight of a buxom woman steadying and being steadied by a disheveled blonde man. He immediately noticed their Shinigami uniforms and made a note to add a few additional fees to their total price.

"D'you fellas want a room with a king-size?"

The man giggled. "Naaaaah…."

The woman held up a single finger…in the complete opposite direction of where he was.

"Siggle."

_Single. _

Where these people being cheap? Or did they think he was stupid? He knew what they were gonna do once they got up there.

"This here ain't a love hotel."

The woman pointed, or rather, jabbed at the blonde's cheek. "Dis here ish Luten Kira. Wur bod fends. No sex."

_This here is Ruten Kira. We're both friends. No sex. _

Yoshito rolled his eyes.

He was going to charge them the king-size room.

It's not like they'd notice. Even if the woman was actually telling the truth and one of them was dropping off the other, would he or she really remember when they passed the desk and left?

"Okay." Yoshito lied. "A single."

He reached for the key for the most expensive room. Which was an overstatement given the condition of the rest of the hotel.

Yoshito named the price and the blonde reached into his pocket and plunked down enough coins to cover rent for three days.

"Keep de change."

"What, for the third day?" This guy was really shit faced to be giving him that much money. The woman too for not noticing.

Yoshito shrugged and handed the woman the key, as she looked the more stable of the two.

"Oyasumi." Yoshito muttered as he placed the coins in the register. If he showed his mother how much money he had made in one night later in the morning, then perhaps she would show mercy and cut his sentence down to just two months.

Yoshito's yawn was interrupted when he heard a thunk and then a loud laugh. He sighed and figured that one of them has slipped on the way up the stairs.

He placed his magazine on the counter and began flipping the pages, stopping to read the article if it caught his interest.

In no time, the lobby returned to its usual state of calm.

About twenty minutes later, Yoshito was picking his nose when he heard hurried steps coming down the stairs.

"What now?" He almost whined.

_"Pssst!"_

"Huh? Kioshi? What're you doing up?"

Kioshi, his older brother, was supposed to be asleep.

"Did 'ya give a room to a couple recently?"

"Yeah? They came in not long ago. Why?"

"Well they're screwing like animals! Hurry up! We're taking turns peeking through the keyhole!"

The 176 year old Yoshito Maruyama dashed from behind the desk and took the stairs two at a time to join the 192 year old Kioshi Endo in their peeping tom mission.

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A/N: Hoped you liked it! Read and reviews ladies and gentlemen!


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